I dont have the money to travel over there. I've seen some offers on clearnet but im not risking getting scammed. Haven't found anyone selling them on darknet neither.
I'm not 100% suicidal anymore so whatever.
a lot of 30mg+ oxycodone pills or heroin. you will feel nothing. they have painkiller attributes like no other. just stomach it down as much as you can. you will want to throw up if you take just one pill.
Prepare a BBQ with about 1 Kg of charcoal. Light it outdoors first and wait until there are no flames or smoke (about 1 h) and take it inside a small enclosed space like a car or tent or a toilet. Seal the place well, tape vents, keyholes etc.
The CO concentration will relatively quickly reach lethal levels and you will lose consciousness after 5 - 10 minutes and die within maximum 1 h.
Make sure nobody finds you within a 12h period.